Crazy be Youz

Boy + GIRL friends = just friends

Boy + crazy BITCH from hell = FUN for everyone

Now I'm pretty insecure and possessive myself but here's why I'm not crazy:

1. the guy's my boyfriend

2. somebody is actually flirting with him to piss me off

3. the guy knows I exist.

If you miss out on number 3, there is definitely something wrong with you. In the words of my new found comedic hero, Russell Brand (a.k.a., Katy Perry's not so attractive boyfriend), "You...are essentially....an oxygen thief".

There's nothing wrong with having the hots for someone. There's nothing wrong with hating all the girls around him. There's nothing wrong with screaming his name just so he'll notice you. There's nothing wrong with deliberately hanging out with his org even though you're not a part of it. There's nothing wrong with posting silly messages on his Facebook wall just so people would think you guys have a thing but you really really don't. There's nothing wrong with him lending his stuff to somebody else and you taking it from that someone just so he'll get it back from you. And there's definitely nothing wrong with glaring at all his girl friends (including those he isn't even close to but you've convinced yourself otherwise) and calling them bitches to their faces with this pathetic whispering act (Hint: they can hear you).

So woman, I humbly shower you with all my sarcasm. I know you'll eventually figure out who you are and I'm betting you'll throw acid to my face when you find out where I live. I'd prefer that, honestly. 'Coz if for one second you couldn't tell that this was you, wow.... you iz seriously one craaazy bitch.

How I Really Feel

Religion is like a dick

It's okay to have one,
It's okay to be proud of it
It is NOT okay to wave it around in public
...
AND IT IS NOT OKAY TO TRY TO SHOVE IT DOWN OTHER PEOPLES MOUTH"

 

from someone on the internet

Gawd

Warning(because I'm feeling nice today): this is an angst blog. If you're in a good mood, please don't read this.

I hate myself right now. What the hell am I doing keeping this horrible, well not horrible, just horribly annoying person in my life. I could just say "fuck off'" and end the misery but somehow that doesn't feel right either. I dunno. Sorry, that's my conscience talking.

You know how there are just those certain people that you can't stand? But you stick around anyways just to keep the peace? It's sorta like that. This person annoys the shit out of me. Ever since, it's been "oh my gawd(yes,I'm gay that way), look at me you guys, I'm so fucking important. Oh hey, why the hell aren't you guys spending all your fucking time looking, admiring and openly praising me? Hey I'm this. I'm that. Ooh, are you jealous?? I bet you are... Be impressed! I'm so fucking impressive. Everything I do is impressive. PLEASE BE IMPRESSED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And when somebody else is taking the limelight for a change, I won't even give one encouraging remark. I'm this sweet innocent never-at-fault uhmm 'person'(haha. no gender please)". 

I'm pissed. I'm annoyed. But that's just me. But I do feel sorry for you. I know you live off other people's approval. Other people's oooh's and aaah's. Your perpetual need to make people stare in awe. But you never impressed me. I don't know why. Maybe because I never wanted anything that you have. Maybe because there's nothing impressive about desperation. Maybe, just maybe... there was nothing really that special about you in the first place. Sorry

Told you that was a complete waste of your time.

Breaking Up....

Migraine, we need to talk. I know we have this daily thing going on...but I need my space. It's not you. It's me. I just think I need to meet new...well uhmm, experiences. So could you just please...stop coming over.

100 Truths About Me

Because I enjoy answering stupid questions. 

WHAT WAS YOUR:

1. last beverage: sprite

2. Last phone call: mama heidi

3. Last text message: boyfriend

4. Last song you listened to: maginoo pero medyo bastos

5. Last time you cried: now. My throat is killing me.

HAVE YOU EVER:

6. Gotten back with someone you've broken up with: never broke up with anyone

7. Been cheated on: ohh yes. Niloko ng gwapo. Kala ko sswertehin na sa pangit, aba hindi pala.

8. Kissed someone & regretted it: YES!!! kadiri. I kissed a loser and I fucking hated it!

9. Lost someone special: oo, ung kulangot sa wall ko na tinawag kong "kooli-o"(get it??) ay kinain na ng butiki ='( I need a minute.....

10. Been depressed: kaw ba naman di makapanuod ng glee...

11. Been drunk and threw up: of course! Ang hari ng metal ay mahilig magsuka

LIST THREE FAVORITE COLORS:

12.periwinkle 

13. salmon (yes the color not the fish)

14. the light blue of Luke Skywalker's light saber before it was digitally remastered

 THIS YEAR HAVE YOU: (2010) 

15. Made a new friend: DAMI!

16. Fallen out of love: ang hari ng metal ay laging inlove!

 17. Laughed until you cried: Almost every minute of every day. Kaya nga walang lumalapit sakin.

 18. Met someone who changed you: si Ronald McDonald. Payat ako dati pero now....I've changed.

 19. Found out who your true friends were: haha. YES. If you like calling me ASSHOLE, BITCH, FUCK YOU, PUTA KA, true friend kita. Kung pa-bullshit ka pa jan na you like what I'm wearing, I know you're so fucking jealous of me. eew.

 20. Found out someone was talking about you: Everybody talks about me. If you dont, you might want to start.

 21. Kissed anyone on your Facebook friend's list: ai malay ko ba jan. May kiss button pala?

 22.How many people on your friends list do you know in real life: I'm from the CIA. I know everyone. I SEE everyone.

 23. How many kids do you want?: If by want you mean, kids I dont have to push out my vagina then, as many as I can para no need to hire maids. If kailangan pang i-slice ang pekpek ko para lumabas ang hinayupak, NONE.

 24. Do you have any pets: Meron! Kaso they dont consider me their owner.

 25. Do you want to change your name(marie): SYEMPRE! matuwa ka ba kung kapangalan mo....BISCUIT????! And hindi ung sossy na biscuit, un bang biscuit pang LAMAY!!!

 26. What did you do for your last birthday: spent my goddamn birthday money

  27. What time did you wake up?: 7am. Makati kasi pwet ko nun.

 28. What were you doing at midnight last night? nagsusulat ng excuse letter. Sorry ha, tao lang, nagkakasakit.

 29. Name something you CANNOT wait for?: my 26" waistline

 30. Last time you saw your Mother: uhh..malay?

 32. What are you listening to right now: si ate tibo kitchen helper na nakikipag-away kay manong janitor.

 33. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: Noon. Nung crush ko pa siya. Pero nung nabaliw na siya kay Katey Holmes, I decided we shouldn't really stay in touch anymore. You know...for the kids.

 34. Who is getting on your nerves now?: The floor!! I hate the floor!! I hate it so much!! rawr!! raaage!!!

 35. Most visited webpage: ano ba yan, yahoo and google o pati site. Ai naku, boba.

 36.Whats your real name: MADELINE CHLOE MADRIGAL. Kasi astigiiin!!!

 37. Nicknames: ...Mars (oo ganun ako kalaki noon at kailangan talagang PLANETA ang tawag sakin), Mar, Gel, Ange, ***

 38. Relationship Status: fucking around. You know,...coz I'm cool and all that.

 39. Zodiac sign: Pisces. wohoo! Mabuhay ang isda! Hari ng palengke! Yebah.

 40. Male or female?: Female at mahilig na mahilig sa mga gwapong male.

 41. Elementary School?: Ang pinaka-sosyal na private school ng mga HINDI chinese! yohoo. 

 42. High School?: Ang pinaka-warfreak na school sa balat ng probinsya! Kumakain ka ng lunch, may nagsasambunutan sa harapan mo. Sinamahan mo lang bumili ng pagkain ang friend mo, tinapunan ng sprite ang friend mo sa mukha. Every week may inspection for dangerous weapons sa buong school. Ang classy namin ehh.

 43. College?: worst two yrs of my life **** (if I had the money, I'd burn it to the ground). Then UP Diliman. HAI SALAMAT LORD! People who actually like you better if you're different. Who won't dictate what a person SHOULD look like. How a person SHOULD be like. Where I'm finally FREE TO BE ME.

 44. Hair color: Cosmic Universe Black

 45. Long or short: Ang hari ng metal ay hindi mahilig sa short hair!

 46. Height:  Shorter than a door

 47. Do you have a crush on someone?: OO! Si Kuya green kagabi sa play.

 48: What do you like about yourself?: Psh. Why do I even bother. E V E R Y T H I N G.

 49. Piercings: 3 1/2! Nagsasara na ung isa

 50: Tattoos: ONE

 51. Righty or lefty: RIGHT. Coz you can't spell BRIGHT without RIGHT. You can't spell KLEPTO with LEFT either but it's pretty close.

FIRST:

 52. First surgery: grade 4. MAH NECK MOTHERFUCKERS!

 53. First piercing: Who knows, just woke up one day and I could stick a needle in my goowy, eecky, flesh without shooting anyone.

 54. First best friend: I have NO idea. But I do remember my last. ******** **** *********. You may not be my first, but you're definitely my LAST ;)

 55. First sport you joined: ping pong! Sooo freakin chinese.

 56. First vacation: Davao!!! Every freakin summer.

 57. First pair of trainers: How the hell would I know. I didn't give a fuck then.

 RIGHT NOW:

 58. Eating: yep. my boogers. nom nom nom

 59. Drinking: Mah LAWAY.

 60. I'm about to: have sex with myself

 61. Listening to: this bitch studying out loud. Bitch shut the fuck up!

62. Waiting for: my cookie.

63. I'm feeling: so good about myself! Nothing's sexier than self-confidence. But then again, that only works for people who are physically gorgeous in the first place. Not that I am. *cough cough. I sorta am. Nah, I FREAKIN AM!!!

YOUR FUTURE :

 64. Want kids? Nah, Im not really into goat. See what I did there??

 65. Get married?: What for?

 66. Career: To design YOUR dream house.

 67. Lips or eyes: Both you idiot. I cant have some pretty eyed huge ass mouth motherfucker. And I sure as hell aint going for a sexy lipped lazy-eyed freak.

 68. Hugs or kisses: Depends. If the guy doesnt have arms then FIIIINE, kisses. Useless piece of shit

 69. Shorter or taller: I aint dating a freakin hobit.

 70. Older or Younger: Physically capable. If you get my drift.

 71. Romantic or spontaneous: Only the perfect man can be both. Im sure God can handle that. Right??? RIIIGHT???!!!!!

 72. Nice stomach or nice arms: Haha,sorry ayaw ko makita ang lamang loob ng tao. Kung nice abs sana, ok lang. haha. Nice arms!

 73. Sensitive or loud: BOTH! para makaranas naman ako ng bakla!

74. Hook-up or relationship: Who fucking cares. It's still all sex.

 75. Kissed a stranger: Hoy akala ko ba future toh, kissED mo mukha mo. Kiss!!!

 76. Drank hard liquor: Beer is for the skinny.

 77. Lost glasses/contacts: HAHA. I was riding in the jeep. Then looked in the mirror. My left contact was missing.

 78. Sex on first date: If he's Papa John Lloyd, wohoo! Tara! I promise my vagina wont clamp down on your, well...

 79. Broken someone's heart: I hope.

 80. Been arrested: LAPIT NA! HAHA

 81. Turned someone down: Ang reyna ng sangkatauhan ay marami nang na-reject

 82. Cried when someone died: no of course not. I'm not human. *sarcasm

  83. Fallen for a friend: Dude seriously, FUTURE TENSE. And YES. hai nawalan nq ng gana.

 DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

 84. Yourself: EVERY SECOND OF EVERY DAY.

 85. Love at first sight: YEP!

 86. Heaven: thaaaat's ME!

 87. Santa Claus: YES! Very much. I still get pissed when he doesnt give me the things I fucking wished for. Jackass. I keep writing to you you fat ass impotent piece of shit.

 88. Kiss on the first date: oooh yeah.

 89. Angels: I told you....I believe in MYSELF

 90. God: YES! Mwuah, love you you crazy fucked up guy up in the sky where Katy Perry's naked and tan.

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY:

 91. Had more than 1 girlfriend/boyfriend at a time: no. I am so disappointed with myself

 92. Did you sing today?: Does singing in my head count?

 93. Ever cheated on somebody? again, so disappointed with myself

94. If you could go back in time, how far would you go?: yesterday afternoon, so I could've bought myself a cookie

 95. The moment you would choose to relive?: yesterday evening, when I bought the cookie

 96. Are you afraid of falling in love?: why, does it have teeth?

 97. When was the last time you lied?: yesterday. But that's a lie. So now.

 98. Are you usually late, early or right on time?: Is this about meeting someone or having an orgasm?

 99. Would you give your life to save someone else's?: Hell no, bitch. That's why we have Santa Claus. He'll make all your relatives feel better after you die

 100. Are you afraid of posting this as 100 truths?: The truth doesnt hurt. But the fact that I'm awesome, does.

I want

I want P300M. Not $. Just Pesos. Not 1B, not 3B. Not 100000Z. Just P300M and a slice of brownies. Lord please make the pain go away. And take this frown from my face.

Sick days

Why almost everyone in school is sick:

1. the weather
2. those motherfucking teachers
3. school work
4. school work
5. school work
6. school work
7. school work
8. school work
9. school work
10.school work


I can go on but you get my point....

Conversation

*crappy singing upstairs

L: may videoke ba?

M: I hope so. Coz if that's what they call a concert, well...

How Would Jesus Do in Bed?

Just an FYI: I'm not an atheist. I'm not agnostic. I'm Catholic. I love God. I go to church. I pray as often as I can. And I don't come into your homes in the middle of the night and touch your children.

Now I'm not the one to judge. You can believe in whatever the fuck you want to. But when it starts sounding crazy, don't blame me if I laugh and write about you :)) Even if you are my friend.

No words can ever express the LOL in this

Imagine how stupid I felt when I was just about to congratulate her when I saw those comments. Now I don't know about you guys, but all I could imagine was a guy being baked in the oven, made to be "just right" by God. And God's being all Martha Stewart in St. Peter's little kitchen. *Laughing so hard.

I know you'll hate me. I know you'll mock me. I know you'll judge me. You'll probably even sue me. But as God as my witness, that was too fucked up to not be punned. *big BIG smirk*

If you're still pissed. Call God. He might just turn me into salt and sprinkle me all over your future husband. :)

Screw You You Took My Blog Address . blogspot . com

I was so annoyed when I tried to write my blog title on my blog address and blogspot told me it wasn't available. My only wish was that it went to someone more worthy than me.

But to my horror, this is what I saw.....

Motherfucker

Why I wasted 2min of your time

You guys are probably thinking that I'm this miserable emo bitch who doesn't have a life. And I just love that you guys hate me. Attention whores, unite! 

Seriously though, I'm not emo. Blood is disgusting. What the hell are you guys thinking.

I'm not miserable. I just love saying what I feel and it just so happens they're not sweet and sickly. Is sweet and sickly even an adjective? Isn't it sickly sweet? Bahh, who gives a shit. I told you, I don't care. Just don't ever let me read you write HE'S SCENT or WHO CARE on my page or I will murder you.

Yes I was kidding. Laugh. It's good for you.

I am a bitch. Not the kind that pulls other girls' hair outside bars or in the campus. What am I saying...those aren't bitches. They're garbage. Smile if you agree. You didn't. So you're probably one of them. Stop reading. NOW. Because I love picking on your kind.

Back to me. I love being a smart ass. And yes again, I'm smart. Not obvious? Good, coz I know one of these days you'll call me a stupid bitch. Bravo. Too defensive? Yes. I hate it when people think they've achieved something when they comment like that.

Unfortunately, I do have a life. Too much in fact that I need an angst blog just to balance out all the stress of my busy busy life. I love what I do. But too much of everything, surprisingly, is bad for you. But that doesn't apply to ice cream and cake. Nevvaaaah!

So to all you future haters, you just made Jesus cry.

Don't you just love it when people end things that way?